Letter to All the Mamas
Let’s talk guilt.
Guilt when we get tired of worrying about our kids’ health all the time and guilt when we feel so tired of just being tired.
Guilt because deep down, even though we know – we know – we can’t blame ourselves for our kids’ breathing problems, we can’t help wondering sometimes, “Is it something I did while I was pregnant?”
“Is it something I didn’t do?”
Guilt because of these thoughts:
Why my kid?
(Not that we want it to be anyone else’s.)
Why my life?
Which lead directly to this question for moms with robust lungs like me:
Why am I whining?
I’m not the one who coughs until she gags or loses her voice or both, or who missed a friend’s slumber party a week ago in order to stay home and break the cycle of flaring.
Here’s the thing about guilt: we know better. We know asthma parenting takes a lot of work and a brave heart and a strong spirit, and it’s totally natural and understandable for frustration and self-pity to lurk beneath the steady surfaces we present to our kids. We know better, but unwarranted guilt sneaks up on us all the same.
Or maybe that’s just me.
Either way, listen up.
A message, direct from me to you:
You’re doing a phenomenal job.
I know you don’t always hear that, and it helps to hear it.
I appreciate your advocacy.
I appreciate the reading and research you do on behalf of your kids and that you come here to do some of it.
To those of you raising your asthma kids alone, I appreciate that, too.
I think you’re all amazing. Happy early Mother’s Day.